Bullying Awareness

October 7, 2010

The news is full of stories on bullying and suicide these days. I have submitted my book to Oprah, Ellen, and GMA host, Robin Roberts as my book is very timely; it begins and ends on the subject of bullying. I included this piece to the ladies on the topic of the game changer:

To interrupt the cycle of bullying a ‘game changer’ needs to be introduced into the dynamic between abuser and victim. The game changer is a person in authority, or a person who is actually physically authoritative in stature, who is needed to step in and stop the bully from their abusive behavior. The bully violates personal boundaries. The game changer re-establishes those boundaries and more importantly exposes the bully for who they are, insecure and exploitive by way of their unhealthy narcissism.

While a principal, parent, neighbor, or law officer are excellent types of game changers on the personal level, to influence our society we require public game changers such as those in the media. We need authors, talk-show hosts, experts in the field of psychology, layman, celebrities, and other public figures willing to advocate for awareness and education about bullying and its underlying nature.

The bully is typically someone who has been bullied and feels entitled to bully others. Their unhealthy narcissism is at the root of their need to dominate and garner attention. The attention they crave can be notorious or esteemed, but always high quality and often. The unhealthy narcissist thrives on drama as it garners them attention. They often create drama to attend to their deep seated needs. The drama too often manifests as abuse towards others.

Bullying is just one way persons who have unhealthy narcissistic personalities exert their control. We are seeing an up tick in bullying due to generational parenting where they themselves are exhibiting unhealthy narcissism due to being victims of controlling parents.

On my website, Path to Well-Being, I recently posted this on Collective Narcissism and Ethics:

Those who would exploit, abuse, marginalize, or take advantage of others are engaging in unethical behavior. Often this behavior is encouraged through collective or cultural narcissism. Collective or cultural narcissism can be found in cults, gangs, organized crime, political groups and religious groups. But, collective or cultural narcissism can also be in less obvious groups, like parent-teacher groups, scouting groups, country clubs or groups who have select members. Collective narcissism has the same traits as personal narcissism: grandiosity, strong entitlement, envy, lack of empathy, and self-centeredness; It is imperative that ethical values be taught to help curb entitlement behavior — it is not acceptable to use, abuse, or exploit others.

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